Being Young and Misunderstood? Why Are You Overwhelmed — And What Real Resilience (and Mental Health) Looks Like

Have you ever felt like your mind just won’t switch off? Like you’re carrying more than you can explain, even when nothing "big" seems wrong?

You’re not the only one.

You're not too sensitive. You're human.

🌼 Hey, You’re Not Alone

A recent study in Hong Kong found that 1 in 3 people born between 1997 and 2012 (also known as Generation Z) are experiencing anxiety. Many are struggling with motivation, emotional ups and downs, and a kind of invisible stress that never seems to go away.

Even when nothing huge has happened, everything still feels heavy.

This article isn’t going to tell you to "stay positive." Instead, I want to explore with you why life feels the way it does, and what real emotional strength and mental grounding can look like.

(Gen Z mental health and Real Emotional Resilience)

🧭 It’s Not Just You — The World Has Gotten Loud

What’s on the outside often doesn’t match what’s going on inside. It can feel even more frustrating when older adults around you: parents, teachers, relatives, focus on the wrong things:

• “You’re on your phone too much!”

• “Can’t you just work harder?”

• “Your sleep is terrible. No wonder you’re moody.”

• “You’re so self-centred.”

These comments can leave you feeling misunderstood, and still unheard when it comes to the things that actually matter to you.

Maybe you’re trying to find your way in this whole “adulthood” thing, but it doesn’t feel like anyone handed you a map.

Meanwhile, you’re stepping into a world of expectations. Being in your late teens or early 20s doesn’t always feel like "growing up." It often feels like you're being thrown into adulthood before you're ready.

• Employment feels hard to manage.

• Friendships feel complicated.

• Romantic or sexual relationships feel confusing or intimidating.

• You’re expected to make big life decisions — but you might feel frozen or unsure.

Behind the surface, here’s what’s really going on for many people your age:

You’re not broken.

You’re responding to a world that asks a lot, and rarely pauses to check how you're really doing.

🌍 Why Everything Feels So Intense

You’re growing up in a time when you see everything — instantly. News. Injustice. Everyone’s highlight reels. Climate fears. Global conflict. Grief.

All at once.

Thanks to the internet and social media, you're more connected than ever. That’s powerful but also incredibly overwhelming. Sometimes it feels like your brain is holding 100 tabs open, and you can’t find the one with the volume button.

"Youth today aren't just shaped by home or school anymore. They're shaped by the whole world, every day." — Arjun Appadurai, globalisation scholar

And yet, let’s name something incredible about you:

• You’re more aware of diversity and social issues than any generation before you.

• You understand that people carry stories you may never see.

• You’ve grown up learning to accept differences.

• You’re highly tech-savvy and adaptable.

So if your brain feels crowded, that makes total sense.

You might be:

• Comparing yourself to others online

• Taking in too much information to process

• Unsure about who you are or what matters to you

• Feeling helpless when seeing painful things unfold

That’s called emotional overload. And it’s real.

"Young people are expected to deal with adult pressures way too early, but without the support or tools." — Dr. David Elkind, child psychologist

You may look "fine" on the outside, but inside there could be anxiety, shutdown, or inner chaos. It’s no surprise you might feel lonely, even when you're constantly connected.

And when the people around you, especially adults come from what feels like a completely different world, the disconnection deepens. Especially when they don’t understand digital culture and blame you for being "too online."

So, let’s talk about how you can make space for all of this without carrying it alone.

Take a breath. If any of this sounds familiar — you’re already doing the work just by reading.

---

Gen Z's Mental Health and what Real Emotional Resilience is

Being Resilient is definitely not to toughen up. Rather it is about how to be more 'You.'

🧠 What Real Resilience Looks Like (It’s Not Just Toughness)

You’ve probably heard the word "resilience" a lot. But it’s not just about "being strong" or "pushing through."

Real inner steadiness is:

• Noticing when you’re overwhelmed

• Learning how to soothe your nervous system

• Making meaning out of hard experiences

• Reaching out when you need support

It's not about being perfect, it's about staying connected to yourself, especially when life is messy.

Research shows that what protects mental health the most isn’t toughness. It’s emotional regulation:

• Understanding your feelings

• Naming them

• Learning how to return to calm

And the good news? Emotional regulation isn’t something you’re just born with; it’s a skill you can build over time.

🔍 Who Am I, Really? Identity, Pressure & Belonging

You might have heard people say that your generation is too focused on "work-life balance" or that you're always chasing comfort. But underneath those labels, there’s often something much deeper happening.

Many young people today are asking important, meaningful questions, not just about careers or success, but about how to actually live a life that feels honest, purposeful, and real.

That’s not self-indulgence. It’s self-awareness. And it makes complete sense.

Psychology and sociology research consistently show that humans need more than just achievement. We need belonging, identity, and a sense of inner stability. These aren’t luxuries. They’re part of how we grow a healthy self and make sense of the world around us.

Maybe you’ve caught yourself thinking, ‘Who even am I right now?’ And then felt guilty for not having a clear answer. That’s okay.

It’s okay to feel lost. It’s okay to not know exactly who you are yet. You’re allowed to be in the process of figuring that out slowly, in your own time.

Therapists and psychologists can support that journey, not by handing you a ready-made identity, but by helping you explore and shape one that feels right for you. That’s part of what therapy offers, not just coping tools, but a space to ask: Who am I becoming? What kind of life do I want to live?

🤝 What Can Actually Help?

So… what actually helps when things feel this messy?

Support doesn’t mean fixing everything overnight. It means not being alone in it.

Helpful support might look like:

• Adults (parents, mentors, teachers) who listen without jumping to conclusions

• Schools that have real conversations about mental health, not just posters

• Safe spaces to explore your identity and values

• Support that makes space for your story, not one built on assumptions

Psychologists call this relational resilience. It means your wellbeing isn’t just individual, it grows through connection.

In a world of shifting expectations, "emotional strength needs flexibility, not perfection."

And you don’t have to have everything figured out. No one does.

🧩 When Your Parents Suggest Therapy (Like Family Therapy)

Sometimes, you might be invited (or told) to join family therapy. Maybe it wasn’t your idea. Maybe no one asked what you think.

That’s okay.

Family therapy isn’t about blame. It’s about improving understanding, creating safety in communication, and helping each person feel seen.

And therapy doesn’t always have to be together. You can have your own space to explore things too.

Whether it’s family therapy or teen counselling, your psychologist can help you figure out what feels supportive — without adding pressure.

💬 You Deserve to Be Heard — Just As You Are

You’re not "too sensitive." You’re emotionally intelligent, globally aware, and trying to make sense of a complex world.

That takes courage.

You deserve spaces where you can:

• Be real about what’s on your mind

• Feel safe enough to reflect, question, and grow

• Explore your story, not just survive it

You don’t have to keep it all inside. There’s space for you to feel, reflect, and grow.

If you want support emotionally, culturally, or just as a human — you don’t need to wait for a crisis.

Explore how I work with young adults →

Or reach out to Dr Tiffany Leung here →

✉️ Want the Adults in Your Life to Understand You Better?

I’ve written a version of this article just for them. Feel free to share it with a parent, teacher, or someone close to you:

Read the parent version here →

✍️ About the Author

This article was written by Dr Tiffany Leung — a UK-based psychologist supporting young people in navigating stress, identity, emotional resilience, and cultural transitions. Her work bridges professional insight with real-life empathy. Learn more → About Dr Tiffany

🔐 Note on Safety

This blog is for reflection and education only. If you're feeling really low or in crisis, please reach out to someone you trust or contact a licensed mental health professional. You don’t have to go through it alone.

Asking for help is a form of strength, not a sign that you’ve failed.

You deserve support that meets you where you are.